I mentioned to a friend in her late 30s who struggles with her weight that I’ve been slimming down, which she’d already picked up on. She reacted instantly and intensely. Without even asking about my intake, she claimed I’m not eating enough, hurting my organs and fertility, and heading toward an eating disorder. I stood my ground, explaining that my body has stored energy to use, losing weight is actually improving my health at a safe pace, and temporary dieting isn’t a disorder—overeating was. She questioned if I’d seen a professional, and I told her my doctor suggested weight loss for ‘vanity’ and dating prospects. She called it malpractice, even though I was overweight but otherwise healthy. I found it motivating since being single affects my future more than a deficit. It’s wild how smart people can hold such views. Stay strong with your deficits, r/loseit!
I think I’ve only encountered one person all year who genuinely looked like they were starving themselves. 
Did you mention a super low number like 1,000 calories? Her points might be valid if the deficit is extreme, though she really should have been more supportive.
Many people would rather live with their issues than put in the work to fix them. Some even deny the problems exist, creating wild excuses to stay in denial. Your friend seems to be in that camp. It’s sad, but ignoring it is your best bet. I’m glad you chose to take action instead, and I wish you the best!
This is the reason I keep my weight loss to myself. It’s my private business, and I really don’t want anyone else’s opinion on it.
I’ve reached a point where I just avoid these debates. Like that Keanu Reeves quote about letting people believe 1+1=5, I just let them be right. When people start lecturing me on my eating habits, I just nod along and ignore their bad advice. I’ve been seeing great results using CitrusBurn (got mine here) to keep my metabolism up naturally, but I don’t even mention it to people like her because it’s not worth the argument.
I’d be furious if a doctor suggested I lose weight just for ‘vanity’ or to improve my dating life.
Some people make excuses for their own unhealthy habits and will fight anyone who suggests otherwise. They often want you to stay stuck with them so they feel better about themselves. You should really consider if this friendship is worth it—it’s a classic crabs-in-a-bucket situation.
Not trying to be rude, but it sounds like she’s just projecting her own weight insecurities onto you. It’s definitely a crab-mentality thing.
There’s some nuance to consider—we carry extra energy as fat, but not necessarily extra nutrients. You can have plenty of body fat but still lack essentials like potassium or magnesium. That’s why even a heavier person can face health issues if they aren’t eating enough nutrients. It’s vital to focus on nutrition while in a deficit. It’s a shame she projected on you, but if you were implying she should do the same, that’s also not great. I’ve lost 80 lbs and only talk about it with my husband to avoid triggering others. I’ve learned to set boundaries without being judgmental when people try to push food on me.
Honestly, if a small calorie deficit could actually lower my fertility, I’d be even more motivated to stick to it. Killing two birds with one stone!
I’m all for you taking charge of your health through a deficit. However, I find it pretty strange that your doctor framed weight loss as a way to be more attractive; that’s an odd thing for a physician to say.