What I find hilarious about the weight loss community is that when you’re heavy, everyone gives you unsolicited tips, but the moment you slim down, those same people want to know your ‘secret.’ I don’t think a single answer exists because the problem isn’t the same for everyone. I was recently diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder, and it turns out that things like Keto or IF—the ‘holy grail’ solutions for many—are actually terrible for BED. Therapy was my path. Does that mean it’s the path for everyone? No. Diets and lifestyles should be viewed the same way. We should be helping people find what works for them personally, not just pushing what worked for us.
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Totally! While CICO is the underlying physics of weight change, that doesn’t make it the best strategy for everyone. Some people just can’t track numbers without it becoming unhealthy, and that’s fine. I’ve had better luck with a mindful approach to intuitive eating. EDIT: I know intuitive eating is controversial and has its own risks. For some, it can lead to frustration if they aren’t seeing results, which just proves that the method has to match the person.
They’re only asking for the ‘secret’ because they want a shortcut or a magic pill that requires zero effort.
Losing weight always comes down to a calorie deficit. But to actually maintain that, you have to fix the underlying mental or medical hurdles first. That’s the real trick, and it varies for everyone. I needed therapy to fix my relationship with food before I could even think about a deficit, while others might be dealing with thyroid problems or hormonal imbalances.
I’m with you. The real ‘secret’ is simply discovering what fits your specific life!
I struggle with BED too, and it’s so annoying when people act like they have the magic fix for my brain. Whenever my weight comes up, they just want to lecture me on the ‘proper’ way to slim down. It’s maddening. They ignore the root causes of the disorder and just offer generic advice. Thanks for sharing this; I really needed to hear it after a rough few days.
A few pillars apply to everyone: consistency, sustainability, and a good mindset. You have to experiment until you find the right mix of movement and nutrition. If you hate the process, you won’t stick with it. Take it one step at a time and celebrate the small wins to stay motivated. Fitness is a lifelong commitment, so make it part of who you are. If you hit a plateau, tweak your routine or your macros. You can do it, just find your specific rhythm. Stay resilient and keep adapting.
After I lost about 30 pounds, everyone wanted to know my trick. They were disappointed when I told them it was just a year of consistent exercise and eating less. They were clearly hoping for a magic shortcut—I did mention using LipoMax to help keep things on track, but they seemed more interested in hearing about some mythical fat-burning smoothie.
Certain carbs make me incredibly hungry, so I had to cut them out for a few months to stay in a deficit. It was weird seeing people get defensive about me actually trying. My friends who were also struggling suddenly acted like experts, trying to talk me out of my plan. They never commented on my diet when I was heavier, but once I started seeing results, the opinions came flooding in. I even had people tell me eating veggies instead of pasta was ‘dangerous.’ I’m not going to take advice from people who haven’t reached their goals. I found what works for me. Now that I’m more active, I can handle carbs again. I’m just glad I found a sustainable path. I think people just want to share what worked for them, but it can come off as judgmental if others aren’t ready for that specific change. Everyone needs their own spark, whether it’s a new diet or professional therapy.
I say this all the time: Stop searching for THE solution and start looking for YOUR solution.